.

THIS IS GOODBYE!!

2010-01-11T04:01:00.004+10:00

Dear Bloggers

Thank you for your kindness, understanding and support over the past couple of years.

It is now that this blog says goodbye. It has served it's purpose. Allowing me to express my innermost thoughts and desires.

Thank you for joining me on my ride. Some of you laughed, cried, sympathised or just thought I was a headfucked delusional dickhead. Whatever you thought I'm glad you were reading and thinking yourself.

It is time for me to walk on the path of my next chapter. They say as one chapter ends, another begins. The next chapter will focus on more important aspects of my life, not on food, dieting, competing, bodies or anything of the kind. That part of my life is finished. Although there may be some lifting of heavy shit mentioned.

It has been a pleasure.

Love always

Shelley

PS If you would like to read the next chapter shoot me an email ss2306@bigpond.net.au and I'll send you an invite when it's all up and running.

THE PRACTICE OF MEDITATION!!

2010-01-08T03:50:00.003+10:00

For the non-spiritual being, the idea of looking quietly within oneself and sitting alone for any period of time repeating a mantra, emptying one's mind, and seeking answers by aligning oneself with one's Higher Self borders on lunacy. For this person, answers are sought by working hard, struggling, persevering, setting goals, reaching those goals and setting new ones and competing in a dog-eat-dog world.

The spiritual being knows about the enormous power of the practice of meditation. She knows meditation makes her more alert and able to think more clearly. She knows the very special effect meditation has in relieving stress and tension.

Spiritual people know, by virtue of having been there and experienced it firsthand, that one can get divine guidance by becoming peaceful and quiet, and asking for answers. They know they are multidimensional and that the invisible mind can be tapped at higher and higher levels through meditation, or whatever you want to call the practice of being alone and emptying your mind of the frenetic thoughts that occupy so much of daily life. They know that in deep meditation one can leave the body and enter a sphere of magic that is as blissful a state as any drug could temporarily provide.

For the non-spiritual being this is perceived as an escape from reality, but for the spiritual being it is an introduction to a whole new reality, a reality that includes an opening in life that will lead to miracle making.

SIX HEALING SECRETS OF FOOD!!

2010-01-07T04:37:00.002+10:00

Because our current approach to nutrition isn't working well for so many of us, as a nutrition researcher, educator, and health journalist, it appalls me that so much of the literature in my field continues to focus exclusively on only one of the six secrets: what to eat. If the dice in Las Vegas casinos were fixed so that only the same side kept showing up every time you rolled them, everyone would scream "cheat!"

We are being cheated nutritionally. Food constitutes a six-part gift, but all we're hearing about is one thing. But this skewed perspective, focusing solely on the physiological aspects of food, has become the norm. I call our one-sided, limited view the Dark Ages of nutrition. We think that nutritional science is at its pinnacle, but in fact, most of us are still in the dark about what can most benefit us about food. This is because we're ignoring the most important elements of food and nutrition -- the healing secrets of food -- that have served humankind for centuries. They are:

1. Unite with others through food.
2. Be aware of your feelings before, during, and after eating.
3. Bring moment-to-moment nonjudgmental awareness to each aspect of the meal.
4. Appreciate food and its origins -- from the heart.
5. Create union with the Divine by "flavoring" food with love.
6. Eat fresh, whole foods in their natural state as often as possible.

All these elements count -- not just one or two in isolation.

continue reading here

LAW OF LEAST EFFORT!!

2010-01-06T04:17:00.001+10:00

New Years Eve 2009

If you observe nature at work, you will see that least effort is expended. Grass doesn't try to grow, it just grows. Fish don't try to swim, they just swim. Flowers don't try to bloom, they bloom. Birds don't try to fly, they fly. This is their intrinsic nature. The earth doesn't try to spin on its own axis; it is the nature of the earth to spin with dizzying speed and to hurtle through space. It is the nature of babies to be in bliss. It is the nature of the sun to shine. It is the nature of the stars to glitter and sparkle. And it is human nature to make our dreams manifest into physical form, easily and effortlessly.

In Vedic Science, the age-old philosophy of India, this principle is known as the principle of economy of effort, or "do less and accomplish more." Ultimately you come to the state where you do nothing and accomplish everything. This means that there is just a faint idea, and then the manifestation of the idea comes about effortlessly. What is commonly called a "miracle" is actually an expression of the Law of Least Effort.

Nature's intelligence functions effortlessly, frictionlessly, spontaneously. It is non-linear; it is intuitive, holistic, and nourishing. And when you are in harmony with nature, when you are established in the knowledge of your true Self, you can make use of the Law of Least Effort.

Least effort is expended when your actions are motivated by love, because nature is held together by the energy of love. When you seek power and control over other people, you waste energy. When you seek money or power for the sake of the ego, you spend energy chasing the illusion of happiness instead of enjoying happiness in the moment. When you seek money for personal gain only, you cut off the flow of energy to yourself, and interfere with the expression of nature's intelligence. But when your actions are motivated by love, there is no waste of energy. When your actions are motivated by love, your energy multiplies and accumulates.

--Deepak Chopra, Seven Spiritual Laws of Success

THE LOVE OF MY LIFE!!

2010-01-05T03:49:00.003+10:00

New Years Eve 2009

I am so thankful that you are an important part of my life. It is an honour to share myself with you, to know you, and to walk together on our chosen paths that take us in so many beautiful directions together. I didn't realise what the term "soul mate" meant until you entered my world.

Somehow, out of all the twists and turns our lives could have taken, and out of all the chances we might have missed, it seems as though we were given a meant-to-be together moment, at that first "encounter" on the dance floor all those years ago. We set the stage then and there for a special togetherness that has allowed us to grow together rather than apart.

When I am with you, I know that I am in the presence of someone who makes my life complete. As Tom Cruise said in the movie, Jerry Maguire, You complete me. I turn to you for trust and honesty, and you give it openly. I look to you for inspiration, for answers, and for encouragement, and not only do you never let me down, you lift my spirits, bring a smile to my face, make me laugh and take my thoughts to places where my troubles seem so much further away and my joys feel like they're going to stay in my life forever.

My world is reassured by you, my tomorrows need to have you near, so many of my smiles are for you, and my heart is so very thankful that you and I are one.

I love you so much. You rock my world.

xoxoxoxoxoxo

SOOOOOOO GOOD TO BE BACK!!

2010-01-04T11:16:00.003+10:00

Monday Lift Heavy Shit Training

Floor DB Press
- 15 kgs x 18 reps
- 15 kgs x 16 reps

Bent Over Rows
- 60 kgs x 20 reps
- 70 kgs x 15 reps
- 80 kgs x 9 reps (getting not rowey)

Alternate High Rep Arm Training (10 sets, 10 reps, 1 min rest)
- Seated DB Bicep Curls - 10 kgs
- Bench Skullcrushers - 15 kgs

GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES - SOLD!!

2010-01-04T04:14:00.002+10:00

Please contact me via email ss2306@bigpond.net.au if you would like to purchase any of these books at LESS than 1/2 price.

LOVE IS IN THE AIR!!

2010-01-03T04:14:00.007+10:00

Everywhere I look around. With every sight and every sound. John Paul Young got it right. He knew that love rules all. And when you have love in your heart, fear ceases to exist. The key to happiness is love extended. The key to pain is love withheld. When we extend love to others we in return receive love from not only others but also ourselves. The mere thought of love sends an electricity throughout your entire body. Love is so awesomely powerful it can change the world, having changed you first.

OUR DEEPEST FEAR!!

2010-01-02T04:54:00.004+10:00

Our Deepest Fear

By Marianne Williamson

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.

We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us;
It's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we're liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.

SLAWN-JE VAH (cheers to your good health)

2010-01-01T04:19:00.003+10:00

2009 I bid you farewell. Thanks for the memories (even if some weren't so great). It will most certainly be a year I will reflect upon with admiration and one I will never forget. The year my life changed for the better for ever and ever.

2010 I welcome you with open arms. Set to be the best decade of my life so far. The year where all my dreams will come true. One in which miracles are brought forward. An adventure of a lifetime will take place. Copious amounts of love, fun and laughter will happen.

Time for:

C - confidence
E - enthusiasm
L - love
E - empowerment
B - body
R - respect
A - appreciation
T - trust
I - inspiration
O - optimism
N - now

Slawn-Je Vah xxxxxx

RESOLUTION TIME!!

2009-12-31T04:07:00.006+10:00

I can count on one hand the number of years I have NOT made a New Year's Resolution to lose weight, get back on track, pull back into line, start again on January 1. I was given the opportunity time and time again to learn and grow stronger yet I didn't hear or didn't listen to the calling. I swore the problem was what I was eating and the exercise I was or wasn't doing that was the problem. I continually looked outside of myself for the reason I wasn't completely fulfilled and happy. Luckily these days I know that the elusive butterfly of happiness can only be found within me. I've learned that the answer to happiness CANNOT be found in a diet, counting calories or restricting and depriving myself of the pleasure of food. It is not smashing myself with interval training to burn more calories in order shrink my arse and thighs. And it isn't found in a pill, powder, gadget or gizmo. I now realise that no matter what my body shape or size I am perfect, whole, complete and happy just as I am. I sat on the sidelines for too long watching life go by to get the body I wanted only for it to be taken away again soon after. I'm no longer willing to put off life because I have unwanted fat on my body. I'm no longer putting off till tomorrow what I can do today. My arse and thighs are getting smaller no matter what I eat. It was never what I was eating but rather what was eating me. I've dealt with my emotional baggage, embraced my dark side, found my friend, and now I'm ready to live life. My resolution this year is to focus on the things I do want; freedom, spontaneity, quality family time, to become more spiritual so that my real life example can help others, finish writing my book, and to lift the mother fucker deadlift. There's plenty more but this will do for starters.

THE SUMO TOAD XMAS PRESENT

2009-12-30T04:51:00.003+10:00

Sumo Toad: Strength, inner calm, protection and honour.

The Sumo Toad stands in the defense position, he is highly disciplined and stands upon a lotus flower, the symbol of purity and spiritual unfolding. The lotus flower represents how we, like the lotus, can transcend our current realities and offer up our lives in the successful pursuit of our highest aspirations. The combination of strength, calmness, purity and self discipline being our greatest skills as human beings to attain wisdom and peace. In pre history Osaka, Japan, (post 8th century) a Monk was sitting in contemplation of a still pond. Slowly he became that pond. He became serene and was able, through this stillness, to hear the silent whisper of all of creation. He shared this knowledge with another Monk, a Nun. As they sat together in powerful silence they spied a Crane protecting her eggs from a viper. The old Monks watched the graceful fluidity of the crane's defense versus the slippery, lightning-fast strikes of the viper. This struggle of nature was an epiphany. The Monks imitated the animals' moves and applied their effectiveness in unarmed combat. After many years on the mountain they brought their fellow Monks the first "Animal Styles" of unarmed combat as well as the art of Meditation and Chí manipulation. This was believed to be the beginning of the Toad Style, throwing sharp and poisonous strikes. In ancient times Toad grease was used as a protective ointment so that no sword could pierce the skin.

On another note Happy 10th Birthday beautiful daughter.

THE LETTUCE THAT RUINED CHRISTMAS!!

2009-12-29T05:28:00.004+10:00

Sitting at the bench drinking a glass of wine and talking with eldest son and Mum as she prepares Christmas Eve dinner.

Mum: "Oh shit, I've left the lettuce at home for the salad."

Son: "Good on ya Nan, now you've ruined Christmas." (teenage sarcasm)

Me: "The lettuce that ruined Christmas. A great chapter heading for my book."

Ten times UNDEFEATED boxing champion on the Wii. Yep, that's me. No-one could take me down. Master J (nephew aged 8) told his mother I was a bitch when I beat him. As we left at lunchtime on Christmas Day I told him I loved him and not to call Aunty Shelley a bitch again. I did get the singlet top to prove he was right though (lol).

It was the best Christmas I have had in years yet also the saddest. Finding out that now my Mum has Cancer as does my Dad. I stayed strong on the outside for my Mum but quietly cried on the inside.

With very rainy weather I was able to pull a couple of all nighters only the opposite of what this refers to according to daughter. Like Liz, I managed a couple of 12 hour sleeps which is highly unusual for me and then laid around under the covers, in my pj's, watching The Shadow Effect dvd and reading The Gift of Change by Marianne Williamson I was given for Christmas.

My very special gift from my wonderful husband and children was a basket filled with 10 small packages, each wrapped in calico with a red ribbon and card on the outside reading I Believe In You and when opened revealing an inspirational quote. I am to open 1 each day for the 10 days following Christmas. Each package is filled with a small item to bring a smile to my face, a typed proverb, a single chocolate from Chocolate To Die For, and a note saying I LOVE you for ??? (little things they love about the new me) rolled up and sealed with a gold heart sticker. I am so blessed to share my life with such special people.

Home safe and sound now and getting ready to welcome another fabulous year of fun, love and laughter.

OVER & OUT FOR ANOTHER YEAR!!

2009-12-23T03:40:00.005+10:00

As Christmas approaches we are busy hanging our stockings at my sister's house in my home town in NSW after driving the long drive at the beginning of the week with a mid way overnight break at hubby's aunties place. This year we are blessed to be spending the days preceeding Christmas Day with my family and then from lunchtime onwards on Christmas Day with hubby's family 45 minutes away until we return to beautiful Brissy around the 28th. I will be making the most of it and cherishing each moment as if it is my last. Merry Christmas to each and every one of you. Hoping that Santa delivers exactly what you have desired. I know he will be for me.

WONDERING??

2009-12-22T03:48:00.007+10:00

I wonder if I will be the very first person you know who has released excess body fat through the power of positive thinking? I wonder if you have ever known someone to get the body of their dreams without dieting, counting calories, deprivation or watching what they eat like a hawk? I wonder if you know that spending less than a year of my life has been more than worth it to be free for the rest of my long life? I wonder if my success and results will inspire you to take a leap of faith yourself and work it out so you too can be free from weight struggles/issues for the rest of your life? I wonder?

ONCE AGAIN!!

2009-12-21T04:11:00.009+10:00

In the olden days (I love saying that!) when I set my mind to losing weight it fell off me. During both my comp preps I had to "hold" for a period of time because I was getting too lean too quick. It was commented more than once that I always seemed so positive. Coincidence? I think not. I remember vividly one week "putting my foot down" and doing extra cardio at lunchtime and in the afternoon or evening as well as the usual weights and cardio I was doing in the morning in order to shift some extra lard that week only to be rewarded with a measly 0.2 drop on the scales. If it was simply a case of calories in versus calories out then I should have dropped a shit load that week but I didn't. The extra stress I had placed on my body and mind not to mention the exhaustion had me in a negative balance state of affairs and my body said "fuck you". These days it is my mission to continually be POSITIVE with my emotions and bask in the glorious feelings of Joy, Appreciation, Empowerment, Freedom, Love, Passion, Enthusiasm, Eagerness, Happiness, Positive Expectation and Belief and as I feel all of these wonderful emotions the fat is literally falling off me once again.

NEW YORK, NEW YORK!!

2009-12-19T04:29:00.002+10:00

Start spreading the news. I'm leaving today. I want to be a part of it. New York, New York. I can't stop singing. Time Square was the most memorable way to spend New Year's Eve. This famous tradition dates back to 1906. We arrived early in the afternoon the take our position in a viewing section. The NYPD directed all the revelers into each viewing section and although it got quite crowded I didn't seem to notice too much as I was too busy checking out the eye candy in uniforms (lol). With the flip of a giant switch, the New Year’s Eve Ball illuminated and began its ascent accompanied by special pyrotechnic effects atop One Times Square. At 11.59 pm the lighted ball started it's descent into a New Year. The Ball is a geodesic sphere, twelve feet in diameter, weighing 11,875 pounds. The Ball is covered with 2668 Waterford crystal triangles and lit by 32,256 Philips Luxeon Rebel LEDs. At the stroke of Midnight, the lights on the New Year’s Eve Ball were turned off as the numerals of the New Year “2010” burst to life shining high above Times Square. Confetti was released from the rooftops of buildings throughout Times Square creating a celebratory blizzard of colorful confetti as we welcomed the New Year with kisses and a family hug. This is what I call living! Family moments like these are priceless.

FLOATING DOWNSTREAM

2009-12-18T04:06:00.006+10:00

I am effortlessly floating downstream. I do not have any paddles in. There is no need to. I am moving with the current, not against it. I feel alive yet at peace. The scenery is most wonderful making the process fun. I am feeling my way. It is amazing, invigorating and exciting. I'm loving and appreciating the contrast of it all. I'm waving with Joy. It's a beautiful thing.

I'M BUGGERED!!

2009-12-17T11:39:00.004+10:00

When I lift that from the floor I'm advancing to backflips over cartwheels!!

Rack Pulls - Placed

- 140 kgs x 6 reps

- 150 kgs x 3 reps

High Rack Pulls - Placed

- 150 kgs x 6 reps

- 160 kgs x 6 reps

- 170 kgs x 1 rep

- 180 kgs x 1 rep

- 190 kgs x nuh

A DEFINITION OF SUCCESS!!

2009-12-17T04:43:00.009+10:00

Most would attribute success to getting what they want. They think it can only be achieved by giving it everything they have. They believe there are no shortcuts, that it takes hard work and determination. What if success could be the Joy you feel. The dreams and visions and feeling positive as they unfold. Success could then be defined as a happy life, and a happy life is just a string of happy moments. Most people do not allow the happy moments because they are so busy trying to get a happy life.

SHINING THE LIGHT!!

2009-12-16T04:06:00.008+10:00

It never ceases to amaze me the effort people go to in decorating their houses for the festive season. It is like these houses have been sprinkled all over with magic dust to become a twinkling fairyland. There are fairy lights hanging on the fences, in the trees, from window to window, and wrapping their boundary in a tinselly glow. Illuminated Santas, reindeers, stars, bells and xmas trees seem to jingle the essence of Joy. It is when December sparkles that I know that Christmas is approaching. As we drive around the streets hunting for the lights there is an overwhelming feeling of contentment as I think of the pride these men and women must feel upon seeing their completed masterpieces with the first flick of the switch to on, and every night thereafter. The hours, months and days they have spent in creating excitement and happiness for others. It is these people who scream “celebrate”, “put on your happy face”, and “the holidays are here”. I feel like a child at heart.

HOW YOU FEEL!!

2009-12-15T04:32:00.013+10:00

Abraham tells me "There is nothing I cannot Be, Do or Have". He says there is nothing more important than me feeling good. That when I feel good I am going to find thoughts that feel even better. It's how you feel, how you feel, only how you feel. It's not what you eat, it's how you feel when you eat it. It's not what you say, it's how you feel when you say it. It's not what you do, it's how you feel when you do it. It's not about the food or the exercise. It never was and never will be.

AGREED AND NOT!!

2009-12-14T13:45:00.003+10:00

Bench Press

- 60 kgs x 3 reps (forearm partials)

- 60 kgs x 5 reps (rack partials)

- 60 kgs x 10 reps (off pins)

Lat Pulldowns

- 200 pds x 5 reps

- 185 pds x 6 reps

Push Press

- 45 kgs x 4 reps (scary hard)

- 45 kgs x 2 reps

High Tricep Pushdown

- 50 pds x 20 reps

- 50 pds x 13 reps

THE PROCESS!!

2009-12-14T04:15:00.011+10:00

Little did I know when I started this journey that there was actually a process one goes through from jumping off the merry-go-round to reaching one’s natural weight. I was unaware that someone who had been there, done that has actually put together a guideline for the progression. I did not see this until I was nearing the end of the wave. It was encouraging to say the least to see the steps I had taken actually down on paper. Remember the angry day? That word c*nt cracks me up every time I hear it. Then there was the rebellion with the fuck diets forever header. Following on was the legalization of all foods, letting go of the false control, and hence the inevitable weight gain. I then found my faith and reclaimed my spiritual Self, something I had not even considered since childhood. There were emotional issues that emerged from childhood with forgiveness and understanding given. At times I became frustrated, overwhelmed and experienced hopelessness. Obsessive thinking about food and weight was reduced, all whilst continuing to practice eating and feeling and the continuation of emotional processing. A transformed relationship had occurred and I am finding acceptance, trust and love within myself resulting in the ultimate – Freedom, and when I will reach my natural weight.

THE "HOW TO"??

2009-12-13T04:34:00.012+10:00

I sometimes get stuck, worried and confused with the “how to”. I know I want to get from A to B. I know what A is – I’m there now. I know where B is – I see and feel it every day. But when I think of the bit in the middle it seems just too hard to comprehend. But just like watching a kettle boil, it’ll take forever. I never notice that my finger nails have grown long until it’s time to cut them. I don’t look down and wonder how did they grow, they just did. I don’t question how I’m going to pick up the mother of all fuckers, a 150 kg deadlift, next year. I just know that I will. I didn’t know that I was going to travel the process and journey through stages to get to where I am now. If I had have seen all these progresses in the beginning I would have been overwhelmed. But at just the right moment everything I needed to continue moving forward was presented to me. Therefore, the “how to” is something I need not concern myself with. When I stop to question it I'm putting a foot on my brake. Because I’ve imagined it, I know I can achieve it. I’ve dreamt it, therefore I can become it. If I trust and believe it I'm there in no time flat.

GIVING TIGER A BREAK!!

2009-12-12T10:58:00.003+10:00

Whilst I don't really know about all the drama that is unfolding about Tiger Woods playing up on his wife I kind of feel for him. I feel that he has fallen prey to the same psychological storm that so many of us encounter at least once in our lives. For emotional eaters it comes more often. The storm is when that dormant seed of self-hatred, self-loathing, or low self-esteem that lies within us awakens to destroy the good life we have created for ourselves. And it seems to happen to the best of us, even Tiger Woods.

How we feel about ourselves always shows up, in one form or another. Either in the partners we choose, the jobs we take (or lose), the income we settle for, the weight we pack on, the financial chaos we create…and, if you get all of the others right, then the sexual transgressions we get involved (and caught) in.

I don't believe it's about the sex. What is it that Tiger is looking for? My guess - a feeling. It's always a feeling that we are looking for. I hope he uncovers what his self-defeating behaviour is about and finds that feeling closer to home.

Final word: I do NOT condone infidelity/adultery. If my husband cheated on me I'd cut his dick off. I'm just saying has anyone thought that there might be more to it than tits and arse??

THE PENDULUM HAS STOPPED SWINGING!!

2009-12-12T04:39:00.010+10:00

Hey there gorgeous

So nice to hear from you. Sorry I haven’t been in touch lately. As you know I’ve been “pre-occupied”.

So sorry to hear that your Nan is not well. I hope when you read this that she is still with you. I want to say to you that when she does leave please know that this was her wish. She felt complete and had done what she came here to do. She was happy and fulfilled. Grieve for your loss but do not grieve for her death. Her physical body may no longer be with you but her Spirit will ALWAYS as Souls are eternal. She would want you to know that she will be watching over you and by your side forever. I hope you find comfort in these words when you need them.

Me, what to say? As incomprehensible as this may seem I am the biggest I have ever been (aside from pregnancy) yet I am the happiest (most of the time). I do still occasionally have down days but they are few and far between and I can usually get myself out within a day, two tops. The pendulum has stopped swinging. My mind is in the middle but my body is on the right hand side. It’s only a matter of time before it re-aligns in the middle again. My intention has been set. I have asked and I have received. I just haven’t allowed it yet. I will have “the body” by Easter 2010. It’s a sure thing! I have experienced so much Joy in the past couple of months. They have well and truly made up for the past couple of years. Fun has been my middle name of late. Just this past weekend Dave had a work do down at Peppers Resort at Kingscliff. The wives were invited and treated to a spa treatment at The Golden Door Spa. We had a beautiful dinner, the company was great, and the highlight of the night was me on the dance floor at the pub with a live band playing. T’was just like old times. Wish you were there bustin’ out the moves with me. Only difference was I didn’t show what a fabulous singer I am (lol). I let someone else take the spotlight. We had the bestest time.

Now, your friend. Yes, by all means give her my blog link. And I’d love to meet her. From what you’ve said if she keeps up her current regime she’ll burn out and crash before too long and she’ll end up a looney like I did. But, in saying that, she has to be ready to let go and accept and believe. It has to be her time to listen and hear. Only she knows if she can do that. But I will help in whatever way I can.

Can’t wait to see you at Xmas time. Got some very, very exciting news to tell you. And no, it’s not that. Dave’s had the snip remember. Unless you class creaming ones legs for deadlifting baby-making (hehehe). Mind you there’s been plenty of practice going on. I have a constant smile on my face (lol).

Anyway, best get this sweaty body (been out for an amazing run this morning) into the shower. Dave and I are Christmas shopping today whilst MIL is here. Tra la la, tra la la, lah, lah, lah.

Love Shelley

b105 CHRISTMAS APPEAL!!

2009-12-11T16:03:00.002+10:00

There are so many worthwhile charities, drives and appeals doing such great work but there's always a few that ring true to your heart and touch you deeply. The b105 Christmas Appeal is one of those for me. I have been brought to tears listening to the heartwarming stories of children unwell and suffering with their families. I cannot imagine what it would be like to live with the child you have brought into the world being so sick. It certainly makes "a little bit of extra fat on my arse" a fucking joke. If we all donated just $1 it would make a HUGE difference. Your dollar can help to fund groundbreaking research and medical equipment. This year your donations will go further than ever. The Golden Caskett is donating $2 for every $1 that you donate. So, please give generously and make a donation.

JUST ONE MORE!!

2009-12-11T03:25:00.013+10:00

I'm not quite there yet but so very close. So close I can smell and taste the sweetness of success. There's just one more to be added to the masterpiece that is my body. The word "Freedom" to be tattooed on the inside of my right wrist. It will be symbolistic just as all my other tattoos are. It will indicate freedom from my past, freedom for the future, freedom in the present moment, the here and now. And freedom for all. It will be at this point that I will know I am free forever!

TRAINING WITH THE SPUNK!!

2009-12-10T11:58:00.003+10:00

It's my blog and I can write what I like. Shortless and lubeless.

Rack Pulls - Placed
- 130 kgs x 6 reps
- 140 kgs x 6 reps
- 150 kgs x 2.45 reps

High Rack Pulls - Placed
- 150 kgs x 4 reps
- 160 kgs x 2 reps

Lying Leg Curls
- 50 pds x 30 reps
- 60 pds x 20 reps
- 70 pds x 10 reps

Single Leg Press
- 140 kgs x 12 reps
- 160 kgs x 12 reps
- 180 kgs x 10 reps

DANCING WITH LIFE!!

2009-12-10T03:09:00.010+10:00

There's a fire in my belly, igniting my passions and desires and giving me the inner strength and courage to pursue my dreams. I am becoming more aware of everything within me and around me. I am listening to my instinctive mind, my perceptive, intuitive mind, and gradually I am learning to listen to the wisdom which comes from being in the presence of my Divine Self. My life is much cleaner and less cluttered and my confidence grows stronger and stronger each day. Sometimes I am filled so completely with love, light and laughter I feel like my heart is going to explode out through my chest. My very own creative spark is revealing itself. It has been patiently resting until now, until I was ready. We all possess this force to be reckoned with and express it in many ways. It is through this dance with life one discovers her true Self.

FROM SOMETHING TO NOTHING!!

2009-12-09T04:03:00.012+10:00

In the same way that we leave time between a delicious main course and dessert, allowing ourselves time and space to digest all that happens within us and around us is an important practice. Just like exercise, Nothing is a practice, a discipline in itself. We spend so much of every day, of our lives, running around like blue arsed flies, distracting ourselves with things to do, places to go, and people to see we can go for days, even months and years without truly connecting to ourselves. And why? Do we associate our self worth with our achievements and successes. If we do nothing we consider ourselves lazy. Nothingness delivers a clarity about our existence. It supports us in choosing what we do and don't desire. It gives us the chance to get to know ourselves intimately. And can create something beautiful out of nothing at all. It can make our hearts sing and ground us to every moment.

INSIGHTS!!

2009-12-08T03:55:00.009+10:00

There's a book to be written, manuscripts being created. I must recall my insights and discoveries. What are they? What have I learnt? It is somewhat overwhelming thinking of the "how to" in order to create the outcome and I start to question my ability. But just like my journey to my natural weight I remember to dismiss the outcome and concentrate on the Here and Now and the how to will be taken care of and just happen. At first I struggle to remember them but as pen starts to hit paper, like a snowball effect, one by one they come flooding back filling me with excitement as I recall the progress each one delivered. I list them in point form. And then how do I expand on these and express, what I now know, to others in a way that will inspire them to live their dream, find their authentic Self, love life as much as I do, and Be Happier than they ever thought possible? Being the change you wish to see in the world seems so much easier than writing it. But then nothing worth doing is easy. Unless, of course, we believe it to be so.

SEEING & FEELING!!

2009-12-07T13:23:00.002+10:00

I needed to see what a 150 kg deadlift looks like. I needed to feel it. And now I need to believe it. This mother of all fuckers is in my vision and I'm gonna pick it up next year.

Bench Press

- 53 kgs x 5 reps

- 55 kgs x 5 reps (forearm partials)

Lat Pulldown

- 185 pds x 9 reps

- 185 pds x 6 reps + 2

Push Press

43 kgs x 3 reps, miss 4

43 kgs x 4 reps + 1

Floor Press

- 40 kgs x 5 reps + 1

- 40 kgs x 3 reps + 1

CHRISTMAS MAGIC IN QUEBEC CITY!!

2009-12-07T04:05:00.014+10:00

If someone had a crystal ball a few years ago I would not have believed that I could be where I am today, embarking on the most amazing journey and benefiting physically, emotionally and spiritually. Thinking about how far I have come I become overwhelmed as I reflect on my journey. Perhaps adding to my feelings is the magic of Christmas. Quebec City is the perfect place to celebrate Christmas: snow that covers the city in a winter blanket of white, nativity scenes, carols in the streets, midnight mass, trees hung with multi-coloured lights. It's just like the tales in the books I was read in my childhood. Christmas here means home cooking, using recipes passed on from generation to generation. Indulgence in all the wonderful treats is a delight. But no matter where I am in the world I know that the Joy of Christmas is Me.

THE SHADOW PROCESS!!

2009-12-06T04:13:00.004+10:00

A MATTER OF PERCEPTION!!

2009-12-05T04:00:00.011+10:00

Life is a matter of perception. What we perceive influences our happiness greatly. Approaching life with energy, enthusiasm and excitement brings boundless opportunities and wonderful adventures. How we judge or think about something is a matter of perception. What we perceive to be of value to our lives is our perception the worth of that something will bring. When we place too much importance on something, it can change what we perceive to be of value. We place far too much importance on things when in reality, we just want it because we think it will make us happy.

A TRANSFORMATION!!

2009-12-04T04:14:00.018+10:00

I have personally experienced the change of consciousness, a transformation. I have become one with Spirit. From within is where that journey towards Spirit starts. Through observation and focus I have watched my energy slowly awaken, the lights turning on ever so gradually. By personal experience I have come to know Spirit is one's own truth. I have emerged like the butterfly from her cocoon, now experiencing a deep appreciation for the sacredness of life and love. I have discovered my true Self - my purpose, my fulfilment, my happiness. No one or no thing can take this away from me.

I'M NOT A QUITTER & I'LL NEVER GIVE UP!!

2009-12-03T08:35:00.006+10:00

I couldn't pick the fucker up today. Am I upset about this? - Nope. Because I knew it!! I THOUGHT last week "next week I won't get it off the ground". I created my reality today. I can lift 130 kg's. I've done it before - tired, so fresh I should have lifted it straight up but this has just reinforced the power of my mind and thought. Yesterday was filled with doubts, what if's and tears. I will not entertain these thoughts or feelings any more. KatieP assisted my rescue with this:

"I bet Roger had his doubts too when he ran and ran and still couldn't break the 4 mins. But he did it, and you can do it too. If people can get better from cancer, you can heal a few fat cells." Gotta love a friend who can make you laugh in any situation.

Deadlifts & Rack Pulls
- 130 kgs x Gong

Leg Extensions SS with
- 10 kgs x 50 reps
- 15 kgs x 40 reps
- 20 kgs x 35 reps

Lying Leg Curls
- 40 pds x 30 reps
- 40 pds x 25 reps
- 40 pds x 25 reps

Single Leg Press
- 120 kgs x 20 reps
- 140 kgs x 15 reps
- 160 kgs x 10 reps

On this day 43 years ago a baby was born. This baby grew up into the most wonderful man on this earth. He is my husband. 37 years later, 6 years ago this man had his very own son, my second son. Born on exactly the same day, 8 days past my due date and therefore share the same birth date. Happy Birthday to two of my favourite boys.

MORNING DISCIPLINE!!

2009-12-03T04:03:00.021+10:00

Each night before I lay my head down to sleep I set my alarm although it is rarely needed. My body wakes of it's own accord by it's rhythmical body clock. After some basic hygiene I start my day with vital greens and a cup of green tea. A short while later I head out the door. I have not planned what I will do or where I will go. I allow my feet to guide me and take me in the direction that is my path today. In sequence my legs move; left, right, left, right. Sometimes the pace is a mere brisk walk and at other times they desire a bit more and I run. I have headphones in my ears with the latest tunes but often I turn them off and listen to my breath. I imagine with each breath in the white healing mist entering my lungs and repairing any damage I may have done through my years of neglect from smoking. I visualise my heart growing stronger with each beat. I hear the birds chirping. The rainbird informing me rain is approaching. Cicadas speaking their language to each other. I see trees gently swaying in the breeze and I smell the beautiful scent emitted from the frangipani's as I pass by. I notice things I dare not have noticed before for fear that this distraction may inhibit my efforts to lose weight and I dare not shift my focus to nature and all of the wonderful surroundings. But that was then and this is now. I am constantly amazed at the beauty and uniqueness of all things - great and small. The difference in species, the change in weather from day to day, the miraculousness of our world. I have come to realise from those moments, calories burned, heart rate and VO2 max mean absolutely nothing. Happiness and love of life are all that matter. In the end, they’re all that will ever matter.

AU REVOIR CHICKEN ARMS!!

2009-12-02T04:40:00.015+10:00

I am constantly changing and evolving. I will never have the body I once had. I have what I have now being a different version of what I have had previously so what I will have in the future will be different than what I have now. I will have whatever I create. It is not by chance or coincidence that I have come to realise my love of lifting really heavy shit. It is ok to desire "the body" but I understand that I don't need the body to be happy. I don't need anything external to have happiness. I already have everything inside me. It is called love. Love for myself and love for others. I live love and happiness. Everything else is "that ain't livin' Barry".

Au Revoir chicken arms.

YOUR TOOLBOX!!

2009-12-01T04:31:00.018+10:00

Intuitive Eating/Mindful Eating/Inner Wisdom Eating is just one tool in the toolbox of "Happiness". This tool alone will not complete the set. You'll need to work with all the other tools equally as often before you become competent with the use of each one. As you do so with each one you can place it into your box. If you only work with the IE/ME/IWE tool other parts of your life will remain broken and in need of repair. Before you know it you're toolbox will be full and ready for whatever task life throws your way. You will BE the Master, the Bob, of your toolbox.

NOT THE NORM!!

2009-11-30T11:53:00.003+10:00

Monday's Lift Heavy Shit Session

Bench Press

- 50 kgs x 8 reps

- 50 kgs x 6 reps + 2 short

Lat Pulldowns

- 170 pds x 15 reps (getting short)

- 170 pds x 12 reps (getting short)

Push Press

- 38 kgs x 9 reps

- 40 kgs x 5 reps, miss 6

Floor Press

- 38 kgs x 4 reps + 4 hip humps

- 38 kgs x 7 reps + 3 hip humps

THERE'S SO MUCH MORE TO LIFE!!

2009-11-30T04:25:00.020+10:00

When we are confused about who we are we become obsessed with food and weight and diets because we are afraid of ourselves. We avoid our negative feelings. We love the feeling of controlling our lives with a plan for what we eat, when we eat, how much (or how little) we eat, when and how we train because it takes away the emptiness, the hollow, the hole inside. We pre-occupy ourselves with all of this to fill the void. We feel better about ourselves because we've achieved a certain weight, a certain look through following a certain diet or a certain plan.

Weight doesn't need to be controlled or managed or constantly watched. It doesn't have to be a never ending battle or struggle. It is the belief system driving this thinking. And beliefs can be changed.

If only we'd realise there's so much more to life.

MARKET DAY!!

2009-11-29T08:18:00.004+10:00

Today is Sunday, market day. Organic food markets right here in Brisbane. I had not planned to go but the lure of my beloved organic cranberries is too strong to pass up. I have come to love these little beauties which are imported from Canada. Their sweetness is quite extraordinary. Added to oats and cooked apple they have become a daily love affair. Nicole has inspired me to get back on my pushie. I blow off the dust and clear the cobwebs and set off, backpack strapped on. It has been a long while since I rode a bike but it is like yesterday. Once learnt, never forgotten. As I pass the morning walkers I greet them with a warm smile and simple, yet effective "morning" and am replied with the same gesture of kindness. Ascending my first hill my quads scream at me, begging for me to stand up and I reward them for their efforts by doing so half way up. When I finally reach the top I am puffing like "the magic dragon" and grateful that the land is now flat for a good while. It is a muggy morning but I hardly notice breaking through the breeze. Once at the markets I lean my bike against a tree and set off on foot exploring each stall for what might spark my interest today. I kick myself that the shopping was done at the supermarket only yesterday. The smell of fresh fruit and veges sends my taste buds salivating. I buy my cranberries and am given a discount. I'll take it as one "miracle" today. My only other purchase is a raw food cake which I will save for dessert tonight and share with hubby. Made from 100% raw plant foods I'm sure it will be delightful, delectable. Time to trundle home. The rest of my family may be up by now. As a ride along a flock of pigeons fly beside me for a good 100 metres before landing on a power cable. I hope they don't shit as I ride under. I'm home and the only one up is little boy. My clothes are soaked in sweat and my face red like my cranberries. I take his hand and lead him down to the pool. Standing on the edge we both call out "canon bomb" before jumping in. I am instantly cooled and refreshed. Another brilliant day has begun.

R U OK?

2009-11-29T03:50:00.008+10:00

R U OK is being held today, 29 November 2009. It is an annual national day of action that aims to get Australians, right across the entire spectrum of society, connecting with friends and loved ones, by reaching out to anyone doing it tough and simply asking: “Are you ok?”

Hello, my friends, hello

Are you ok? I've got time to talk.

IT'S WHAT YOU BELIEVE!!

2009-11-27T04:41:00.015+10:00

What you believe is what creates your behaviour. If you believe that chocolate or lollies will send you into a sugar spin than that will be the case. If you believe your belly will bloat up from bread or your guts will gurgle from artificial sweeteners than that too will happen. If you believe you'll get fat from eating fat then hello cellulite. Therefore, it is at the level of belief, not at the level of behaviour, that needs modification. Where does your belief come from about the particular food? Was it an incident from your childhood that you have attached the association of that particular food to? Think long and hard, but if it doesn't come to you immediately, leave it because it will come to you soon if that is what you choose. And then when it does realise it and reverse it. Then put that particular food everywhere in your vision - your handbag, the car, the benchtop, the pantry, the fridge. See it often. Realise that you can eat it whenever you want. Understand that it will not hurt you. You must be willing to be uncomfortable, for a little while at least, to create a life that is comfortable where no food is good or bad, no food is off limits, no food will have an effect on you. At the end of your comfort zone, is where life truly begins. And always remember, it's just food for fucks' sake.

AND AWESOME I WAS/AM!!

2009-11-26T11:52:00.004+10:00

I LOOVVEE lifting SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much!!

Thursday's Lift Heavy Shit Session

Full Deadlifts
- 120 kgs x 8 reps
- 130 kgs x 1 rep

Single Leg Press
- 100 kgs x 20 reps
- 120 kgs x 20 reps
- 140 kgs x 20 reps

AIN'T LIFE GRAND!!

2009-11-26T04:52:00.011+10:00

This photo taken from my home recently

Today I cried. Though they were not tears of sorrow but rather tears of joy. A proud moment in time of the realisation of just how far I've travelled. From a troubled soul with a bottle of sleeping tablets in her hand just a few short months ago wondering how many it'd take and longing for the pain to end to who I am now - ME. One who wakes every morning reflecting on how amazing life is. Wondering what miracle will be presented today. Who's life will be touched. What adventure will take place. Which of my successes will be brought forth.

Life truly is Grand.

I DREAM!!

2009-11-25T04:29:00.012+10:00

I dream of giving women the gift of freedom that lets them wake up feeling comfortable in their own skin and beautiful in their bodies, whilst creating healthy habits and strengthening their bodies for a long, happy life ahead of them. I know that when they become acutely aware that they are living this dream, they will feel deeply fulfilled.

I want them to take deep breaths and fill their lungs all the way to their stomachs with life giving oxygen. To indulge with a presence of mind that enjoys what they are feeding their bodies without the feeling of guilt. To love shamelessly and celebrate vigorously. And to celebrate gratitude for all the many blessings they have in their lives.

SENDING YOU AN ANGEL!!

2009-11-24T04:06:00.004+10:00

Hi Shelley

How are you and your family? Ok...here is the drill. My baby is now 1 and I am still FAT! I keep trying and failing to lose weight. I lose some and then gain it again. I have no discipline for longer than a couple of weeks! It is basically the same story as last time. I keep putting kids, husband and work before me so leave no time for me or more correctly, I am not a priority. I was wondering if you could mark my journal for me? I still have your program and would really like to start at the start again. (I have done this numerous times in the past 12 months) but I feel like I keep failing cause I slip into bad habits as soon as I become stressed (which seems to happen every couple of days with work and 3 kids). I really think I would stick to it if I knew you were going to check my diary. If you are able to do this for me, just work out a price and I will get it to you.

I really hope you have the time to save me again! I really felt amazing last time and it only lasted for such a short time. I still remember the feeling of finding out I was pregnant! It really devastated me! But I am so lucky to have her now and I really need to move on with it. I have put my life on hold to some extent the past year as I say "no" to many things as I feel I am too fat to do that. I would really like to have the confidence to go to parties again, go to the gym (I am too fat to go there!), go to the pool and beach and wear swimmers and run around with the kids without feeling like I am wobbling every where!

Hope you can help me.

SENDING YOU AN ANGEL SWEETHEART!

TRAINING TODAY!!

2009-11-23T12:55:00.002+10:00

Too busy to think of a fun title.

Bench Press

- 45 kgs x 8 reps

Lat Pulldown

- 155 pds x 17 reps (getting short)

- 170 pds x 10 reps

Push Press

- 30 kgs x 16 reps

- 33 kgs x 17 reps

Floor Press

- 35 kgs x 10 reps

- 35 kgs x 9 reps + 1

BEing THAT PERSON!!

2009-11-23T04:30:00.004+10:00

Who is that person? What does she look like? How does she act? What does she think and feel?

She is so much more than her body alone. She is a kind-hearted, caring soul with good intentions here to help those who want to be helped. She is lean and strong. She is confident, vibrant, bubbly, exciting, buzzing, an extrovert, laughing, happy, smiling, singing and dancing always. She doesn't think about food or what to eat or when to eat but plays each day out as it is presented. Minute by minute, hour by hour. She eats whatever she wants and never gains any weight. She trains hard by lifting heavy shit only a few days each week leaving other days to explore art galleries and museums, and walk around the city, and sit in a library for hours, and wags her kids from school and takes them to the beach or to a fun park or whereever on the spur of the moment. She shows love to her husband like no woman has ever loved her husband more. She spends time BEing with herself by walking or running each morning if the mood dictates. She has exquisite taste for the finer things in life and the simple things like watching the leaves rustle in the wind. She is grateful for all that has been and all that will be but more importantly she is appreciative of What Is Now. She uses meditation and prayer to alter energy vibration. She does not entertain negative thoughts. And she uses her intuitive and psychic abilities to go deep within and get in touch with her feelings. She is satisfied with nothing less than lightness.

That person is ME. This is the greatest vision of Who I Really Am. My body may or may not transform. I believe it will but I can't let my life slip by whilst I wait for it to catch up. I'm moving on and BEing that person NOW!!

OPTIMIST'S CREED!!

2009-11-22T04:21:00.003+10:00

The Optimist's Creed by Christian D Larson

EXCITING NEWS!!

2009-11-21T04:00:00.002+10:00

Just a quick email to say:

Guess what??

My publisher just called and told me my book has become a BESTSELLER. Woo Hoo!! I am achieving what I set out to do in "helping others find happiness."

Gotta dash now off to cooking school. We’re de-boning a duck for dinner. Move over Julia, Mademoiselle Sofie is in da house!

Love to all

Au revoir
Shelley

THE SECRET TO YOU!!

2009-11-20T04:27:00.000+10:00

A REALLY HONEST SET!!

2009-11-19T11:00:00.003+10:00

Matt's deadlift analogy for a really honest set. He likened it to a car running out of petrol. It takes maximum force to generate movement of the car to get it to roll. But then someone puts their foot on the brake and again maximum force is required to facilitate more movement. Each rep today was just like that. There was no bouncing, no catching, only stopping and starting each time - a really honest set.

Full Deadlifts
- 110 kgs x 15 reps
- 120 kgs x 4 reps

Rack Pulls (on platform)
- 100 kgs x 6 reps
- 110 kgs x 6 reps
- 120 kgs x 6 reps

Single Incline Leg Press
- 80 kgs x 20 reps
- 100 kgs x 20 reps
- 120 kgs x 20 reps

THE DOOR!!

2009-11-19T03:59:00.004+10:00

At times I feel like I am all alone, with no-one on my side, although I know that this is not true for I am never alone. It's so hard to explain what I am doing to others. And when I do I know they don't believe in what I say and therefore what I am doing and trying to achieve. They look at me like I'm a fucking fruit loop, somewhat dillusional, off with the fairies. And I know, I once would have thought this myself. It's a long process, not overnight magic like I wish. I ask God "When is the outside going to reflect the inside?" I have nowhere to go but forward. This is the direction I have chosen. I can't go over it, can't go under it, can't go around it. The only way there is through it. I know where I've been and I've fought my way through thus far closing many doors behind me. The only door now which will take me where I want to go is the door marked "Self-Belief". I have approached this door many times before. It is familiar to me. Only this time I will knock politely and enter. It does not matter what others think, it only matters what I think and I know deep down inside it is my heart and soul that will unlock that door, where eveything I have ever wanted will be waiting for me, and close it gently behind me.

Les grandes pensées viennent du coeur

2009-11-18T04:21:00.010+10:00

As I sit here with a warm cuppa I have come to understand that making time and taking time is a pleasure to be enjoyed, not a nuisance to endure. Falling in love with my Self again has changed my life as I knew it, and has opened the door to another life. My dream has come true. We have a magnificent view down rue Ledru-Rollin and a garden on the balcony that wraps the house in serenity and calm. I wake of a morning to the delicious aroma of fresh croissants wafting through the morning air from the boulangerie a few steps away from our house. I stroll down the street with a basket on my arm heading for the market. This is part of the pleasure of living in France: the wonderful produce found at the market from fruit and vegetables to fish and livestock. There is also a beautiful flower stall which I buy a fresh bunch of flowers each week to be placed in the middle of our dining table. There are many “Bonjour Shelley” received as I have come to befriend the locals. Every day here is la petite adventure in my une plus grande aventure called Life.

Les grandes pensées viennent du coeur translated: The greatest thoughts come from the heart.

Vauvenargues

LIFE IN THE COTSWOLDS

2009-11-17T04:21:00.013+10:00

The English countryside is breathtakingly beautiful, somewhat hypnotic and gentle. The serenity of the meandering streams encompasses my learnings to just trust life. It is here, beside the picture-postcard rivers that my meditation each morning takes place. I have now, more than ever, come to appreciate the timeless beauty of what Is is what is supposed to Be. Quiet, leafy lanes lead to the flat topped, rolling limestone hills offering far reaching views to the vales beyond. They free my mind and let my spirit wander – freely. The feeling of peace is palpable. There’s a real sense of community here in the picturesque village. The friendly folks at the farmers market, which we frequent regularly to buy our meat, poultry, fruit, veges and free range eggs, are a highlight to our days as is the pint of beer accompanying the bangers, mash and gravy. To the pub we are but a short walk from the honey-coloured stone cottage which we now call home. It has its own unique character giving the impression that time really has stood still here. Another being in the moment moment.

TAKING MY BRAVERY MEDAL!!

2009-11-16T04:24:00.008+10:00

I've been working soooooooo hard on all of THIS that I've turned it into another competition. A competition of "When?". When am I gonna get the body I dream of? I've been putting up with what I have, a bit like surviving the hunger and exhaustion of a diet, in order to reach the end (standing on stage). But I can't do it anymore and no longer want to. The past weekend has been just as exhausting mentally and I realised that just recently I haven't been stopping to smell the beautiful scent emitted from the roses again. I've succumbed to the focus of getting what I want and no-one or nothing will stop me. It's obvious to me now that I still haven't found the acceptance and love of my body as it is in it's current state. I need to let go, give up the fight. I have no doubt whatsoever that this is not my natural weight. My body is not naturally designed to carry this much body fat. But concentrating and planning on it will only block it and while I'm watching it seems it'll never arrive. I will still hope and believe and dream and pray as this is the formula for all of life but I need to move on, again, for I am so much more than my body alone. With persistence, even the snail made it onto the Ark. My body the snail, my heart and soul the Ark.

There's been a whirlwind of uncomfortable feelings and thoughts that I don't like but someone beautiful told me a couple of days ago that "It's ok to be sad sometimes. That we often chase an elusive state of deep happiness all the time. We're not designed to be happy all the time and being sad sometimes creates important reflection time. We just need to learn how to use those times and how to manage our minds and bodies to keep a balance overall." To this beautiful soul - thank you! But you know the strange thing here? I now know all of this "stuff". I know they are just feelings. I know I don't have to fight them. I know to just accept them. I know it's ok to feel scared and uncertain. And I know that it's ok if I want to eat to numb the pain. But what do you do when you can't even fucking binge anymore? Imagine that, a binge being impossible. Unbelievable yet true. I just can't do it just as I can't smoke or drink to get drunk on purpose anymore. So, instead I just have a really really good cry.

Wasted energy again. I could have used this energy in a more productive way - like shagging all weekend - oh hang on I did that, well maybe shagging some more, or playing with my kids in the park, or clothes shopping, or going to the movies, anything other than wasting another precious second consumed by shit. So, once again I'll take my reeeeeally shiny and pretty bravery medal (thanks Kek) and say "fuck it".

HEADS OR TAILS? YOU CHOOSE!

2009-11-15T04:34:00.009+10:00

Heads you diet. Tails you binge. You can keep tossing the coin for as long as you want. But whilst ever you continue to do so know that you can't have one without the other. Do you really want to live your life like this? Yeah, sure you may have what you'd call a "shit hot body" for a while but that body disappears so quickly taking with it another piece of your self worth. I urge you to put the coin in your money box and bank on the fact that money doesn't buy happiness. Only you can get happiness with courage, patience, and determination. And this way you'll have it every single day for the rest of your life.

IT'S NOT ABOUT THE CALORIES!!

2009-11-14T04:20:00.009+10:00

I'm jumping back a bit here and again reiterating it's NOT about the food or the calories. Just about everyone believes in the calories in versus calories out equation. But not this little black duck. I beg to differ. How do you calculate how much energy is being expended by all the receptors sparking and joining together to form such positive energy? The vibrations that keep on fueling positive feelings. The fat cells melting as if they had been struck by lightening or zapped by a laser beam. But you're fat they say. And I answer "Is that what you see? Then you need to look deeper because FAT is not who she is!" I may live very very happily inside this outer shell for another six weeks, maybe six months but then as if by magic I WILL Be at my natural weight. Six month or the rest of my life in The Cycle? I'll take the first one thanks.

Trust and Believe and You Shall Receive!!

MERCI

2009-11-13T15:41:00.005+10:00

Between the two of us Liz and I received 83 comments on our posts to help the Inspire Foundation. I got warm and fuzzy at times, smiled heaps, welled up with tears, and even burst out laughing at the comments left and the kindness in other's hearts. I was honestly thinking there'd be a lot of "hello's" but instead was given fuel for my fire, my passion to help others in any way I can.

A sincere THANK YOU to all of you.

Love and hugs

Shelley

PS I donated $100 cause I like evenness!!

HEALING THE HEART MIND!!

2009-11-13T04:34:00.009+10:00

Albert Einstein made many references to intuition and its importance. He said, "The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honours the servant and has forgotten the gift." In his own groundbreaking research, he allowed his heart brain to lead him into new territory. Einstein also wrote, "I believe in intuition and inspiration, at times I feel certain I am right while not knowing the reason."

I feel certain I am right while not knowing the reason. I feel exactly the same way. The feelings we experience so potently seem to precede our logical rationale for them or even preclude logic at times. As we go through life gathering wisdom, we learn to trust our feelings, to follow our hearts and let the brain catch up.

NEARLY NEEDED THE BUCKET!!

2009-11-12T12:55:00.005+10:00

Note to Self: 1 hour before deadlifting is not enough time to digest banana. Came so very close to using the Lab's green bucket which Matt had placed to the left of me. Thankfully I kept it in.

Full Deadlifts

- 100 kgs x 20 reps

- 110 kgs x 10 reps

- 120 kgs x 4 reps

Rack Pulls

- back said no

Single Incline Leg Press

- 60 kgs x 20 reps

- 80 kgs x 20 reps

- 100 kgs x 20 reps

I WOULDN'T TRADE THE PAIN FOR WHAT I'VE LEARNED!!

2009-11-12T04:16:00.013+10:00

In my pursuit of happiness I have been led down a path of self-discovery. I have sought to find true happiness. I wanted to know the secret. The secret of people who look deeply satisfied. Before I set out on this journey I didn't have the clarity of direction that comes from being fully aware of my Self, my actions, my beliefs, my place within the universe, to reach anywhere truly extraordinary. I've realised that I can't expect the world around me to be bright and cheerful if the world inside me is dark and chaotic. I've been self destructive, anxious, lacking in confidence, unaware of who I was and where I am heading in life. I've had to find the 'real' me. I am a good person with good intentions. I have made mistakes in the past and I may make mistakes in the future but it does not matter. The past is gone and the future is not here. All that matters is right here, right now. I believe everything happens for a reason. Life is mysterious and miraculous. I now know that I can do anything, be anything, feel anything. And it's all my choice. I have chosen to Be Happy which is an outcome of being grateful. Happiness is bigger than success and more rewarding than money. It's Joy, Comfort, Peace and Love all rolled into one.

WE CAN ALL HELP!!

2009-11-11T03:35:00.009+10:00

I have no idea how many people read my blog. I don't have one of those counter thingy's. Nor dor I have any desire to know. But for the purpose of this exercise I'd like to know. Not so I can stalk you, or preach to you, or chase you for business, or for any other reason you may think of. The reason being is I want to help others. And I'm sure you do too. For every comment left on this post I'll donate $1 to the Inspire Foundation. Their mission is to help millions of young people lead happier lives where their dream is for a world where every young person can stand up and say "I am happy". It's just a comment. A quick "hello" will do. If you don't have a google account create one - it's easy.

I first heard of the Inspire Foundation when one dark, lonely night I sat googling trying to find the answers and came across Reach Out. I read a lot of the fact sheets and stories. Although it is aimed at helping young people I found it really helpful for myself.

What Can You Do to Help?

First and Foremost Leave Me a Comment.

Spread the Word. If you have a blog mention this and link back.

Send this Link to your family, friends and work colleagues.

We sometimes wallow in our own self pity that we forget how good we have it. We forget that there are millions of others struggling with issues far more life threatening than our own. Whilst we have a roof over our heads and food on the table others live under the stars without food for days. Many of us have Love in our Hearts, others are still looking for it. Help them find it - please!

This coming Friday, I'll make the donation and post the result. Thank you so much.

WOO-HOO, 5 AND A BIT WEEKS TILL XMAS!!

2009-11-10T04:17:00.013+10:00

This year thankfully there'll be no pulling my finger out. No getting back on track. No having to lose 6 kilos in the next six weeks. There'll be just doing as I have been - living and loving me and my life. I'll get up most mornings and go for a walk smelling the fresh, crisp air as I leave the house. I'll notice the dew on the grass and my footprints with each step I take. I'll see the sun flickering glimmers of light on the creek, I'll say "morning" or smile at every person I pass. I'll lift some heavy shit with Matt or Liz, and go about each and every day with intent and purpose glancing often as I pass by a mirror to admire my reflection. I'll accept every invitation to Christmas parties we are able to attend. I'll look forward to eating some quality restaurant food. I'll eat to the point of satisfaction and then I'll stop. I'll have a couple of glasses of wine and maybe a couple of vodies if I feel like it. If I don't I won't. I might have dessert, I might not. I'll be sociable, engage in conversation and enjoy listening to others and what they have to say. I'll laugh and have fun and might even have a boogie too. I'll go home and fall into bed exhausted from all the laughing and my feet will be aching from dancing in heels. I'll have a wonderful nights sleep and instead of waking up in the morning and going for a run I'll stay in bed for some morning glory. I'll get up and shower and give myself a smile in the mirror while I wait for the water to heat up before stepping in. Then I'll eat my normal breakfast and continue to eat normal for the rest of the day. I'll go with my husband and children looking at and appreciating all the effort others have gone to decorating their houses with xmas lights. I'll sing "Hi-5" Christmas songs with my kids as we drive around continually being "wowed". I'll smile when the kids yell out "Merry Christmas" to others as we pass them in the street. And when we get home and put the kids to bed I'll tell them "I love you". Then I'll go and sit on Santa's lap and tell him "I love you" too. I'll go to Church with my Mum this year, the first time in a very long time. I’ll wake up on Christmas morning and thank God for my wonderful life. I'll feel just as I have every other day leading up to this one - joyful and happy. I'll be excited and at ease when I open my box of Lindor Balls knowing that they'll last more than 1 day. I'll get emotional watching the joy on my children's faces as they open their presents from Santa and I'll cry when I read the card from my husband that says "I'm so proud of you" because this year I'll be proud of myself too for the right reasons. I'll enjoy the sharing of all meals with our families eating only the foods I feel like and again listening to my body and stopping when it tells me I've had enough. I'll lead the "cheers" by holding up a glass of my favourite verdehlo and saying "here's to a Christmas full of love, fun and laughter with family" whilst wearing my paper xmas hat that has come from a cracker. When dinner time comes I won't eat if I'm not hungry or I might decide to have just a little knowing that it is ok. I'll have a few vodies and sing xmas carols whilst whipping everyone in a card game and laughing like a hyena. And then I'll fall into bed thinking that it was the best Christmas Day ever.

I LOOK AT THINGS DIFFERENTLY NOW!!

2009-11-09T11:30:00.003+10:00

Monday's Lift Heavy Shit Session

Bench Press
- 35 kgs x 24 reps
- 40 kgs x 14 reps
- 45 kgs x 5 reps

Lat Pulldown
- 140 pds x 20 reps
- 155 pds x 15 reps + 1

Push Press
- 30 kgs x 8 reps
- 25 kgs x 20 reps

Floor Press
- 30 kgs x 15 reps
- 30 kgs x 15 reps, miss 16

OH SHIT, 5 AND A BIT WEEKS TILL XMAS!!

2009-11-09T04:36:00.011+10:00

It's time to pull my finger out. I've been stuffing around for the past couple of months. And the extra fat has gone straight to my arse. Time to get back on track. I have to lose 6 kilos in the next six weeks. I wanna be 63 kilos by Christmas Day. I'll do cardio every day and weight train four days each week. I'll jump on the scales each week, sometimes mid week also so they can tell me whether to be happy or pissed off for the day. I'll decline Xmas party invitations or only go to the ones I have to because I won't be able to eat the food or drink alcohol or I'll go and either stand around churning on the inside and looking like a stuck up bitch or call it a cheat meal and go for gold so I go home stuffed to the brim that I want to be sick. When I can't fit any more food in during the night I'll sneak outside and suck a few ciggies into me hoping they might speed up my metabolism to digest the food or I won't eat but just get smashed instead. I'll wake up the next day, beat myself up doing a 10 km run in record time, then starve my body with minimal food for the remainder of the day to make up for what I ate/drank the night before. I'll look in the mirror and hate what I see for a few days until the bloat subsides but then I'll be smokin' hot again. I'll let my husband take the children xmas light looking because I'll be too tired and will have to go to bed with Big Dog. I'm gonna work so hard so on Christmas Day I'll be so happy when I jump on the scales and they tell me 62.9 kgs. I'll be so proud of myself. I'll feel invincible. I'll skimp on breakfast with the family so that I can eat more at lunchtime when I know the American Baked Cheesecake my husband has made will be served. I'll eat all of the left over Ferrero Rochers on the Xmas table so that there's none around tomorrow. I won't eat any of the salad cause it's Christmas Day and who eats salad on Xmas Day? I'll inhale 1 slice of cheesecake and because it was so bloody good I'll have a second piece. I'll try and drink alcohol to get drunk but there won't be much room so I'll just have to have a rest for a bit. I'll wander up the road for a bit to get a nicotine hit. Then I'll serve up the left overs for dinner but I'll still be full but I'll eat anyway. After dinner when everyone is sitting around drinking, laughing, playing cards with Christmas Carols playing I'll go to bed cause I really don't feel well and I just want today to be over so I can start again tomorrow. But just before I go to bed I might as well finish off the box of Lindor Balls my kids gave me. I'll fall into bed and think what a wonderful Christmas Day it was - NOT. I'll get up and pull myself back into line tomorrow and for the next few days so I can be 63 kgs again for New Years Eve.

Pigs Might Fly Too!!

To be continued..................

WHAT'S WRONG?

2009-11-08T04:14:00.007+10:00

What's wrong with saying "morning" to someone as you pass them on your morning walk? What's wrong with smiling at someone as you pass them in the street? What's wrong with helping an elderly lady find an item at a health food store? What's wrong with giving a wave and mouthing "thank you" to the driver of a car who gives way to you? What's wrong with tipping a handsome french waiter who has given you excellent dining service? What's wrong with picking up your rubbish when the event is over? What's wrong with telling your husband and children "I love you" every single day? There's absolutely nothing wrong with any of these things, yet why don't we do them more often? What's wrong in the world today is we lack showing kindness, gratitude, empathy and love to ourselves and are therefore unable to show it to others. I thank God every single day I'm no longer the bitch I used to be and give to myself as well as others.

FOLLOW YOUR HEART!!

2009-11-07T03:57:00.002+10:00

Inside your body is a hallway and right bang smack in the middle of the hallway between your soul and your mind lies your heart. The soul's nature is Joy and Joy runs to your heart and is then able to enter your mind. Our souls contain the language of our feelings. If you close your mind your feelings will back up in your heart and hence the term "my heart is breaking". And when you are really really happy your heart feels like it is bursting. If you allow yourself to express your feelings and have an open mind you'll push the feelings out and your heart will not break or burst and the life energy in your soul will be flowing freely. You can heal any moment if you have Joy in your heart.

IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR ME.....

2009-11-06T15:21:00.002+10:00

I'll be doing this:

And this:

Yesterday's training got delayed till this afternoon due to Prince Charming arriving right on time on Tuesday and showing me exactly how my body is supposed to work on Wednesday. Since I knew I was going back to the floor deadlifting I thought it would be a sensible move and I was right again. I was reeeaaaallllllyyyyy nervous but knew I'd be right once I got started.

Friday's (usually Thursday's) Lift Heavy Shit Session

Full Deadlifts - 3's Up
- 90 kgs x 3 reps
- 100 kgs x 3 reps
- 110 kgs x 3 reps
- 120 kgs x 3 reps
- 130 kgs x 1 rep (PB)

Rack Pulls - 3's Up
- 120 kgs x 3 reps
- 130 kgs x 3 reps
- 140 kgs x 3 reps (PB)
- 150 kgs x 1 rep (PB)

Leg Press (Feet and Knees Together)
- 200 kgs x 30 reps
- 240 kgs x 20 reps
- 280 kgs x 15 reps
- 320 kgs x 6 reps (PB)

STATEMENT OF THE YEAR!!

2009-11-06T04:40:00.001+10:00

"I would much rather have the body I have now and the life I have now than any body I've had previously."

Accepting my body doesn't mean I'm delighted with all aspects of how I am, but it means that I can stop being critical about my reality in this moment and love what I see at this time. I can treat my body with respect, and understand that any body-hatred and self-loathing hampers my life and undermines my happiness. My Self, as well as my body, requires constant understanding, acceptance and love. I can stand before a mirror and own that this body is mine. I can appreciate my strong arms that allow me to lift heavy shit, my legs which take me where ever I want to go - walking or running. I can accept my womanly curves, my belly which has housed 3 babies, my stretch marks documenting my years of yo-yoing. I can love $10K well spent on boobies, my bright blue eyes, and being tall. And, most importantly, I now know that these physical aspects are only the external expression of my whole Self. I appreciate the complexity of my make-up without needing to choose a right or wrong way to be. I am contented with what is, inside and out.

IT'S SIMPLE BUT NOT EASY!!

2009-11-05T03:45:00.009+10:00

I’ve been joining the dots. Placing pieces of the jigsaw puzzle together. It’s coming together beautifully creating the most wonderful scenery anyone has ever seen. I’ve been trying to figure it all out. But there’s nothing to figure out. It’s already there. A done deal. The slowest method of creating is thinking. Your body performs all it’s most important functions without thinking about it. You blink, you breathe, you sweat, and your heart beats without a conscious thought. It’s simple but not easy. You must get out of your mind and be in a state of awareness. Do not mind a thing or a thought. You are a human BEing, not a human MINDing.

THE PROBLEM IS.....

2009-11-04T04:33:00.010+10:00

The perceived separation from your spirit deep within. You can't be separate from it cause it's a part of you. But you can believe you are separate from it. You can feel separate from it. You think that you are separate from it. You act like you are separate from it. And that's what causes the fear. The feeling of being separate from your spirit is what causes the fear and that's what causes the addiction. That's what causes the need for the painkillers. And that's what causes us to be the people we don't like being. And that's what causes us to need punishment.

On the other side of that pain is peace. On the other side of the sadness is peace. On the other side of the fear is peace. And you come to experience Joy which comes from deep within.

IT'S THE SYMPTOM OF THE PROBLEM!!

2009-11-03T04:21:00.010+10:00

Food Addicts think that food is their problem. Alcoholics think that grog is their problem. Drug Addicts think that drugs are their problem. Sex Addicts think that sex is their problem. People in a miserable marriage think marriage is the problem. People unhappy in their job think that the job is their problem. It's human nature. It's the way it is; always to think something outside of ourselves is the problem. When in reality it's us. We are the problem. The truth is it's a hopeless condition called Addiction.

In the past I have said that I either smoked or ate. If it wasn't either of these it was drinking to get drunk - the dozen or none syndrome. Exercising for a few hours in a day. I traded one addiction for another to block the feeling of fear.

And then freedom came knocking on my door. And when you get to facing your thinking you come to realise how that has gotten you to a place where you needed the excess food or nicotine.

When you face your life you can be totally free.

NICE BOY FOR THE GIRLS!!

2009-11-02T12:11:00.004+10:00

This one's already taken and in a very happy relationship BUT this one's single and 21 (hehehe).

Monday's Lift Heavy Shit Session

Incline Bench Press
- 58 kgs x 1 rep + 2 (watching hands)
- 58 kgs x 3 reps + 5 (vvv partial)
- 80 kgs x 10 reps (off pins - high)
- 85 kgs x 5 reps (on block)
- 85 kgs x 2 reps (on block)

Barbell Bent Rows
- 95 kgs x 5 reps + 5 (shoulder backs)
- 95 kgs x 6 reps (bend overs)
- 80 kgs x 12 reps (they were rows)

Tricep Overhead Extension
- 20 kgs x 7 reps + 1 (headscrape)
- 20 kgs x 6 reps (death)

Lying Bicep Cable Curl
- 23 kgs x 6 reps (scary hard)
- 20 kgs x 7 reps (v hard)
- 20 kgs x 6 reps (v hard)

A is for arms, attitude and assertive.

DID I WRITE THIS TO A CLIENT OR MYSELF??

2009-11-02T04:36:00.004+10:00

What if you THOUGHT like a naturally lean person? What if you ACTED like a naturally lean person? You would BE a naturally lean person. You'd get up, see the sun shining and decide that you'd like to go for a walk/run or lift some heavy shit. You'd spend some time just BEing with YourSELF. Deep breathing, meditating, relaxing. Whatever you want to call it. You'd sit down to breakfast with the family. You'd eat exactly what you felt like. Maybe a piece of toast, some bacon, an egg, some grilled tomato and mushrooms. You'd smell the food, taste the feel, feel the food. This is called eating mindfully. You'd put your knife and fork down between bites. Engage in conversation and laughter. Your food may even go cold because you are having so much fun that you're not even thinking about what you are eating, how much you are eating, is it enough protein, too many carbs, blah, blah, blah. You'd reach a point where you'd say "that was beautiful". You'd instinctively know that you'd had enough to eat. You are satisfied. Then you'd go about your day full of energy and enthusiasm. A few hours later (not even knowing the time or what time you ate breakfast) you'd start to feel hungry so you'd go and eat doing exactly the same as breaky. Eat when hungry, eat what you feel like, eat mindfully, stop when satisfied. More fun and play and then everyone is sitting down for a cuppa and cookies. You're feeling a little peckish but not hungry or starving but you'd like to enjoy the experience with everyone else so you grab a cuppa but instead you ask yourself "Do I really feel like a cookie?" and the answer might be yes in which you'll take one, enjoy every bite and then forget about it or the answer might be "Actually no, I feel like an apple". Or you might decide to have both. Whatever you decide is OK also. Then it's the big family dinner. They've decided on getting pizza's. You're shaking with dread. Oh shit, I'm gonna break my diet. I can't eat that. I'll eat it but I'll get up and go for a run tomorrow to make up for it. All destructive and negative self talk. Or you could accept your thoughts by acknowledging them and throwing them in the river and not attaching any feelings to them. You ask does anyone else want some salad to go with their pizza. I'm making a big bowl. You might eat 1 or 2 pieces of pizza, have some salad and go "fanfuckingtastic". Again you're belly is satisfied, your head is happy and positive and your heart is loving you just as much as you are loving it. And just to top off a wonderful day you have a cuppa and mini chocolate as a nightcap before hitting the pillow, saying thanks for everything wonderful in your life and you drift off to sleep and dream beautiful dreams.

GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN!!

2009-11-01T14:51:00.002+10:00

Had an absolutely awesome night out last night with the girls - Selina, Selina's friend (oops sorry can't remember her name), Jeh, Jadey, Fern, Shannon, Lyndsay and her hubby. Beautiful food, wonderful wine, a couple of sneaky vodies, but the best part - simply being with gorgeous girls laughing and having fun. Unfortunately we didn't get a group shot and I'll leave the other girls to put up some of the pics of them.

Hubby surprises me with the camera whilst getting ready

And the text from hubby I wasn't able to translate: "Je veux te faire l'amour"

BRILLIANT ANALOGY!!

2009-11-01T04:43:00.005+10:00

And excerpt from the book Full Lives by Lindsey Hall.

Susan Kano

The best analogy I've found for the leap of faith into spontaneous eating is from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. In that movie, Indiana and his father search for the Cup of Christ, the Holy Grail, which is said to bring eternal life to anyone who drinks from it. Through a lifetime of research, Mr Jones Sr has learned how to find the Holy Grail and that in doing so he will face "three devices of lethal cunning" otherwise known as booby traps. In the Chronicles of St Anselm, he found clues to getting through the traps. The third clue says "The Path of God: Only in the leap from the lion's head will he prove his worth."

When Indiana reaches this third and final challenge, he stands next to a carving of a lion's head, at the edge of a canyon, miles deep and plenty wide enough to rule out an exceptionally broad jump. There seems to be no way to get to the other side of the canyon, where a cave, carved out of a sheer wall of rock, holds the Holy Grail. Indiana remembers the clue, "Only in the leap from the lion's head, will he prove his worth," and we hear his father, who was left behind with a mortal wound, saying "You must believe, boy, you must believe." Indiana has to believe that if he "leaps" or steps off the edge of the lion's side of the canyon, he will somehow, by the grace of God, not fall to his death, but rather will be allowed to reach the Holy Grail. We see him standing there, looking down, and it's pretty obvious that he's thinking, "Damn it! My father would expect something like this! I'd have to be out of my mind..." But he realizes that he has little choice. If he doesn't try, his father will die and he too will be killed. So he squeezes his eyes shut and he painfully, slowly forces himself to step off the edge, more or less expecting to fall, but hoping and desperately trying to believe that a miracle will save him and lead to the Holy Grail.

If you saw the movie, you know that when Indiana managed to find the faith and courage to step out into thin air, a narrow bridge miraculously appeared underfoot and he very carefully, very slowly, inched across to reach the other side and the Holy Grail. The analogy is clear. As long as you stand on the lion's side of the canyon, you live with chronic dieting, binge eating, or another problem with food. On the other side of the canyon is God's gift to us all: spontaneous, effortless eating and natural weight control. But the only way to get across the canyon is to step into what looks like thin air. There doesn't appear to be anything there to support you. It doesn't feel like you're going to make it across. All you have is scientific studies which indicate that your body is designed to regulate your weight, if only you would let it do its job unopposed.

WHAT HAS YOUR BODY DONE?

2009-10-31T04:28:00.005+10:00

I've never given much thought to what my body has actually done and achieved in it's 37 years in this life.

I entered the world bum first leaving the security of my mothers womb. My body learnt to crawl then walk, fall down, get back up again. It learnt to ride a push bike and later a motorbike achieving a 3rd place in the Australian Short Circuit Motorcycle Titles. It learnt to hop, skip and jump using all these skills to represent NSW in State Age Netball. It learnt to long jump, high jump, throw a discus and shot put, hurdle, sprint short and jog long distances and very successfully in all these endeavours. It learnt ball skills and hand/eye coordination which it used playing soccer and touch football.

One of its biggest and best achievements was growing three healthy babies and carrying them to term. And then pushing watermelons out a hole the size of an orange. It grew coconuts on my chest and filled them with milk with the perfect blend of nutrients to feed my babies.

And growing older it danced, pole danced, ran, rode, stepped and lifted heavy shit.

Pretty fucking intelligent really.

And this is just some of what it has done. So, if it's done all of this and much much more I'm absolutely certain it can learn to regulate my body weight and appetite without outside influence.

THANKS FOR THE LAUGH MUMMY!

2009-10-30T22:05:00.003+10:00

Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart only good for so many beats, and that it...don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiency. What does cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So steak is nothing more than efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef also good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And pork chop can give you 100% of recommended daily allowance of vegetable product.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No pain...good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food are fried these day in vegetable oil. In fact, they permeated by it. How could getting more vegetable be bad for you?!?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for your figure, explain whale to me..

Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' a shape! Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.

And remember:

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!"

HELP WANTED!!

2009-10-30T15:49:00.003+10:00

Are you or anyone you know an e-bay or other seller and want to earn some cash from selling lots of my shit?? You'll have to live in the Brissy area for me to drop it all off. We're talkin' hooker heels, thigh high boots, platforms, rpm clothing, boxing gear, gym equipment, handbags and so much more. Call me 0409 654003.

SEE YOURSELF IN YOUR VISION!!

2009-10-30T04:57:00.008+10:00

It all starts in the mind. It starts with a vision. What do you want your life to be? It starts now with a thought. Don't wait for coincidences. Create your future. Don't give up or be disheartened. Just when you're about to give up, your dreams are just around the corner. Only you know what your life will be.

QUIET TIME!!

2009-10-29T11:06:00.004+10:00

Awesome photography by Corne Lategan. And hot body Nathan Wallace Mr Olympia. Good friend of Matt's.

It was the magic mushies I baked last night. I write better than I speak. One day you're going to receive a book in the mail with the postage stamp marked Quebec City and inside the front cover are going to be the words:

Hey big spunk

I did it!!

Love Shelley

And you're going to say "She was right - about EVERYTHING!"

Thurday's Lift Heavy Shit Session

Stiff Leg Deadlifts

- 115 kgs x 7 reps

- 120 kgs x 6 reps

- 130 kgs x 2 reps, drop 3

Lying Leg Curls

- 80 pds x 8 reps (really really short)

- 80 pds x 8 reps (getting a little better)

- 80 pds x 4 reps (just stuffed)

Leg Press

- 160 kgs x 10 reps - wide placement

- 160 kgs x 25 reps - knees and feet together

- 200 kgs x 20 reps

- 240 kgs x 20 reps

THOUGHTS................

2009-10-29T04:19:00.007+10:00

Thinking means we are in our heads. When we feel something we think it must be true. We judge and react emotionally through fear. What we are actually feeling is trying to tell us something. Feelings come from from deep inside you. Thoughts are just ideas or images. It's the feelings that we attach to the ideas or images that form either positive or negative energy. Thoughts alone cannot harm you. Allow yourself to feel by trusting yourself. Get out of your head and into your body. Breathe girl breathe. Breathe and trust is all you have to do.

Or you can email your friend and tell her you feel scared to which she will reply:

"It's OK to be scared - we can hold hands and together look into the eyes of fear and say "Fuck Off!"

THERE'S NOTHING YOU NEED!!

2009-10-28T04:49:00.007+10:00

There is nothing that you need in order to be perfectly happy. You only think that there is. Your deepest, most perfect happiness can be found within, and once you find it, nothing outside of yourself can compare, nor can anything destroy the total bliss of communication within.

Seek and you shall find. And on this day your need for anything else will end. Simply be quiet. Some call it meditation but it can be as simple as walking alone or sitting quietly. Just BE with your Self in the stillness. Do it often. Do it daily. Stop thinking. It can change everything and you will be a different person.

ONE SIMPLE QUESTION!!

2009-10-27T04:11:00.005+10:00

The most important question you will ever ask yourself is:

Is this Who I Am?

Firstly, who you are not. You are not your past, your yesterdays. You do not need to forget your past for your past has served you, given you a gift. Yet, you have decided to let go and begin anew in each golden moment of Now.

Every decision in life can be profitable by asking this magical question. It will change long-held character traits or behaviours. You will be not who you thought you were, but who you wish to be.

Every decision you make is not a decision about what to do. It's a decision about Who You Are.

You are whoever you say you are.

MATT WANTS YOUR ANSWER!!

2009-10-26T12:18:00.004+10:00

The scenario:

Matt is training at a public gym. There's a girl squating in the squat rack. A group of guys gathered around pointing and watching. Matt notices that as the girl squats her tights become very see-through and it's apparent the guys around are watching her.

Does he tell her?? Would you want to be told?? Would you tell Matt off and call him a pervert if he did tell you??

My answer: "I'm not telling you this to upset or embarrass you but when you squat your pants are really see through and the guys are watching you".

Monday's Lift Heavy Shit Session

Incline Barbell Press

- 55 kgs x 4 reps + 3 short

- 55 kgs x 5 reps (off pins - pins low)

Barbell Bent Over Rows

- 85 kgs x 6 reps + 4 (getting upright)

- 85 kgs x 12 reps

Overhead DB Tricep Extensions

- 17.5 kgs x 11 reps + 1

- 17.5 kgs x 7 reps, fail 8

Lying Bicep Curls

- 20 kgs x 17 reps

- 23 kgs x 5 reps (out of chair a lot)

I CRACK MYSELF UP!!

2009-10-26T04:36:00.004+10:00

Did you know that laughter can do all of the following things (and perhaps much more that scientists have yet to discover)?

• Improves overall sense of well-being
• Burns calories
• Boosts happiness
• Strengthens and balances the immune system
• Releases endorphins to naturally relieve pain
• Decreases the level of stress hormone
• Lowers blood pressure
• Nurtures creativity
• Reduces risk of heart disease
• Floods the body with a natural "happy hormone"
• Helps manage and overcome depression
• Deepens inner peace
• Breaks social isolation and fosters new friendships
• Develops self-confidence
• Alleviates the discomfort of specific physical challenges
• Aids the body in keeping blood sugar at a healthy level
• Cultivates your childlike playfulness for a happier you

So, go on. Laugh your arse off!!

THE TORNADO THAT SWEPT ASHGROVE

2009-10-25T08:01:00.002+10:00

The storyline follows that of Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz.

Shelley who lives in Ashgrove with her husband and two of her children dreams of a better place "somewhere over the rainbow." After being caught up in a whirlwind of a tornado over the past two days she is transported to the magical Land of Doubts. There, the good Lord advises Shelley to follow the yellow brick road to Happiness and meet her Spirit who can return her to Peace.

During her journey, she encounters a Mad Monkey, The Hulk and a Butt Man who join her, hoping to receive what they lack themselves (calmness, love, relaxation) all whilst being hindered and threatened by a Grim Reaper.

The four travellers are marvelled at the wonders they find, but are frustrated at their reception by the "great and powerful" Spirit who declines to help them until they bring her understanding. Daunted but determined they set off again.

God appears and explains that Shelley has always had the power to get Peace; God didn't tell her before because Shelley wouldn't have believed it. Bidding her old friends turned enermies good-bye, Shelley taps her ankles together three times, repeats "There's no place like Peace" and her tattoos take her back to Peace.

We are learning, practicing, falling down, getting up, finding more things that need to be changed, reaching forward into new beliefs and beginnings, and falling backward into depression, bargaining, anger, and blame. We are developing the belief system we need to support our full growth. It's the part of the process that requires understanding and faith. Your spiritual and mental growth may not be immediately visible, but if you stay in the process there is no way that you can avoid seeing the results. Above ground, it may look as if nothing is happening, but underneath a miracle is taking place. This is the most important and tumultuous stage of all. This is the stage where the action is.

IT'S MASTICATION NOT MASTURBATION!!

2009-10-25T03:59:00.002+10:00

What is Fletcherism??

Fletch·er·ism

n : the practice of eating in small amounts and only when hungry and of chewing one's food thoroughly

Fletcher, Horace (1849-1919), American dietitian. Fletcher was plagued by obesity and indigestion most of his life. Then in 1895 he set out to find the key to good health. After several failures he finally decided that the solution lay in chewing one's food thoroughly. He developed a set of principles which he then proceeded to propagate. The basic tenets were these: one should eat only when genuinely hungry and never when anxious, depressed, or otherwise preoccupied; one may eat any food that appeals to the appetite; one should chew each mouthful of food 32 times or, ideally, until the food liquefies; one should enjoy one's food.

Who would have thought one could get so much pleasure from masticating!! (LOL dirty bitch)

WHAT IS IT THAT YOU BELIEVE?

2009-10-24T04:45:00.004+10:00

Every one of us is perfect, pure, and beautiful. We may do things that we deem not perfect but everything in life occurs for a perfect reason. Nothing happens by chance. Everyone that comes into your life does so for a reason. They come to you with a gift, a message, a learning. Everything is as it should be right at this very moment. Your past, as painful as it may have been at times, was what was meant to be. For without it you wouldn't be where you are now. You needed to feel all that you felt. You were destined to survive the nightmare and live the dream. There's a lot that you don't know, a lot that you're still learning. You're doing a bloody fantastic job! You are open to new ideas and new possibilities. You are ready, willing and able. And this is just the beginning.

NEVER FORGET!!

2009-10-23T12:07:00.003+10:00

Or rather always remember what wonderful, supportive, encouraging friends you have.

This fabulous friend threw me the life buoy today when I had fallen into the river with my fucked up thoughts. After 15 minutes on the tready this morning at home I said out loud "I need to breathe" and doing so listening to a relaxation cd thought I had come back to the moment. But then it started again, round and around in circles. I didn't want to train today but thought I'd let her down so instead I let myself down. Removed myself from rpm during track 3 and waited for our weights session but this didn't give me what I needed today. After only a few sets my wonderful friend suggested we call it quits and go and have a cuppa. Thank you so much. I'm feeling much better. I'm off now for a beauty garden organic facial and exfoliating body treatment.

Au revoir et salut

THE BASICS OF A BANGING BODY!!

2009-10-23T04:05:00.006+10:00

Four important fundamentals for naturally lean living:

1 Always eat when you are HUNGRY.

If you don't eat, you don't shit, you don't shit you die (is what my Dad always said)! But know what hunger is. It's not a feeling of boredom or fear or stress or anxiety. Know what it feels like in your stomach. You won't get it right all the time but over time it will get easier.

2 Eat what you FEEL like.

Yep, if you want to eat chocolate and lollies all day long then do so but remember number 1, you're only eating them when you are truly hungry. The mistake people make with this guideline is that they think they'll eat unhealthy food all day long every day but I'm pretty sure even I would get sick of chocolate and lollies if I did this. It's not natural instinct to live on this food and eventually you'll crave meat and veg for example.

3 Eat CONSCIOUSLY and MINDFULLY.

Use all your senses and enjoy every single mouthful. Feel the flavours and delight your senses. Get that party in your mouth happening.

4 STOP eating when full.

You've done it before. It may have been a long time ago but you have done it. As a baby, a child. When your mother tried to get you to have more breast or bottle you spat it out or wouldn't take it. As we grew older we learned to overeat, binge, stuff ourselves stupid. Whatever we learn we can unlearn.

Of course, there are many more variables to this, but here's an excellent place to start. You might like to head over here for a more detailed rundown.

CLEANING UP AND CLEARING OUT!!

2009-10-22T12:07:00.003+10:00

Redbak V-Protein Soy Powder, normally $60, sell $40

Ladybird Protein Crunch, normally $60, sell $45

Hot Rox, normally $93, sell $70

Biotest Superfood, normally $90, sell $60

L-Glutamine, normally $80, sell $65

BCAA's, normally $105, sell $80

Creatine, normally $70, sell $55

L-Carnitine, normally $85, sell $70

For further information on products go here. Some of these below cost price. Will post anywhere. Email ss2306@bigpond.net.au or phone 0409 654003.

CAN YOU BE NICE TO ME TODAY PLEASE?

2009-10-22T11:37:00.004+10:00

Stiff Leg Deadlifts
- 100 kgs x 10 reps
- 110 kgs x 8 reps
- 120 kgs x 4 reps

Lying Leg Curls
- 70 pds x 17 reps + 3
- 70 pds x 15 reps (getting short)
- 70 pds x 10 reps

Wide Stance Leg Press
- 140 kgs x 10 reps
- 160 kgs x 10 reps
- 180 kgs x 10 reps

Yeah right. As if that was nice!

A RECIPE FOR DISASTER!!

2009-10-22T04:00:00.003+10:00

Your body knows best about what you need. Everytime you eat something you don't really want or feel like you are reinforcing the idea that someone other than you and your body knows better and the diet mentality. If you enjoy every single bite you will satisfy your body, mind and spirit so much easier and quicker. How many times have you eaten what you think you should eat rather than what you really want only to continue eating trying to get that feeling of satisfaction only to end up eating the crunchie you wanted in the first place? You could have saved yourself hundreds, maybe thousands of calories and hours of mental anguish if you had just eaten what you wanted in the first place and nutured yourself with love and approval.